Sometimes I feel I am trapped in a circle and I don’t know what to do to get out of it.
Or better yet, crash the annoying circle, get up, pack all my stuff and go to a better place. With no creeps. No superficiality. And no evilness. Something like my dream world. I always dream of a huge field with lots of flowers on it, and a castle in the background. Everything is pastel coloured, only the peonies are bright pink. And bunnies and deer are jumping around. I dream of this since I am 3 years old, and I still don’t know what it means – especially that no one else is there.
Something must be done. As Daisy was saying “And I like large parties. They’re so intimate. At small parties there isn’t any privacy.” Everything is the same in life – the larger the crowd the safer I feel. Less gossip, less judgement. I miss that safe feeling.
Finally summer is here, and summer makes everything seem easier and happier. The colours are bright, the people are smiling. I shall try to blend in with the attitude, drink some cocktails and buy some shoes. That trick always works.